Peeta practices his pole dancing moves
I’m literally dying in the car and my mom is silently judging me
This is my favorite
Jesse Parent - “To the Boys Who May One Day Date My Daughter”
"If you break her heart, I will hear it snap with the ear I pressed against her mother’s belly."
From the Coaches Slam at CUPSI 2014. This performance has the longest sustained break for applause we’ve ever seen a poet have to take.
nice job poisoning your own mudkip you shithead
sorry friends i can’t go out this weekend because i’ll be at the gym all day